September – brighter days and darker shadows
I’m writing this newsletter on the 2nd of September, the second day of Spring here in the southern hemisphere Cape Town. It’s a time of renewal, a rebirth of sorts. The sun is starting to warm us, and the daylight hours slowly extend. As I look through my window, I see the emergence of greenery in our garden. New leaves are appearing daily on my beloved Plane Tree. It’s a northern hemisphere tree – always the first of our garden’s deciduous friends to remind me that we’re leaving winter behind.
Springtime ignites a small flame somewhere deep inside me that brings a glimmer of brightness, optimism and possibility. Even the quality of daylight looks different somehow. But inevitably, as the brightness intensifies, the shadows darken, and I become aware that for every bright thing in life there’s almost always a counter-balancing shadow.
September has been designated ‘Suicide Prevention Month’, and the 10th of September is ‘World Suicide Prevention Day’. The intent is to generate a worldwide commitment and call to action that leads to the prevention of suicide.
To give you a feel for the size of the problem, about one million people worldwide commit suicide each year. This equates to suicide every forty seconds! As of 2022, South Africa has the tenth leading suicide rate in the world while the USA resides at twenty-third. The highest rate is found in Lesotho (see www.worldpopulation.com for more statistics). The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in the USA say that suicide is “a leading cause of death” and “a serious public health problem.” They report that a death by suicide occurs every 11-minutes in the USA alone.
These are shocking statistics, but the human suffering they represent is incalculable. The impact on the families and friends of those who have succumbed to this global ‘pandemic’ is devastatingly tragic. It leaves a deeply catastrophic impact that never goes away.
Suicidal feelings are incredibly democratic and egalitarian. They don’t at all discriminate based on age, gender, culture, socio-economic group, or other such criteria. They can occur at any time in anyone, no matter what demographic group they belong to. Such feelings typically build up over time and escalate from an increasing sense of hopelessness and worthlessness.
Common Causes of Suicidal Feelings:
MIND, a UK-based organisation committed to improving mental health and supporting those experiencing mental health problems, lists a range of common causes or triggers for suicidal feelings, including:
- Mental health problems.
- Bullying, unfair discrimination, racism.
- Bereavement.
- The end of a significant relationship.
- Long-term physical pain or illness.
- Massive change of some kind.
- Financial issues.
- Homelessness and housing problems.
- Loneliness.
- Being in prison.
- Addictions of various kinds.
- Sexual or gender identity issues.
- Cultural/family pressure.
- Various other forms of trauma.
Those most at risk appear to be men and people from LGBTQ+ communities, although women and other groupings are by no means insusceptible. It’s been argued that men may feel social pressure to keep thoughts and feelings to themselves and are anxious about appearing weak if they should speak out. Those in LGBTQ+ communities can experience stigma, hostility and rejection, which also result in suicidal feelings.
Some common signs of suicidal tendencies:
It’s important to recognise the typical signs of suicidal feelings, and the CDC website helps list some of these. It’s often a combination of such signs that are present for those most at risk. They include:
- Talking about being a burden.
- Being isolated.
- Increased anxiety.
- Looking for a way to access lethal means.
- Increased substance use.
- Extreme mood swings.
- Increased anger or rage.
- Sleeping too little or too much.
- Expressing hopelessness.
- Making plans for suicide.
- Talking or posting about wanting to die.
- Talking of feeling trapped or in unbearable pain.
The Good News: Suicide is Preventable – some useful sources of information:
A lot of work has been done in developing practical guidelines and support systems that help prevent people from acting on suicidal thoughts and feelings. Examples of this can be found on the CDC and MIND websites, as follows:
The CDC developed “Preventing Suicide: A Technical Package of Policy, programs, and Practices”, available at www.cdc.gov, which provides information on the best available evidence for suicide prevention.
MIND, a UK-based organisation committed to improving mental health and supporting those experiencing mental health problems, offers a list of practical tips and suggestions for those who are feeling suicidal. They can be found at www.mind.org.uk
A word about our FIVE LENS assessment:
Our FIVE LENS assessment and methodology has been available for over a decade. It was built on the bedrock of deep psychological research and insights drawn from well-established, credible theories on human behaviour. The aim of the central assessment instrument has always been to provide a well-rounded, integrated summary of a person’s observable behaviour and insight into what may be motivating that behaviour. The FIVE LENSES refer to five perspectives that our Personal Feedback Reports (PFR’s) offer to individuals. Coaches internationally find that debriefing clients through their PFR’s enables significantly increased self-awareness, leading to a particular path of personal growth and development in the coaching journey.
The second Lens in our FIVE LENS model is Emotional Resilience which is essentially a measure of a person’s internal experience of stress. We find that when an Emotional Resilience score is very low, the experience of stress is typically very high. In some cases, this may indicate that a therapeutic intervention is required rather than simply coaching, or perhaps in conjunction with coaching as an additional support structure.
In a small minority of cases, we’ve encountered clients who have expressed suicidal thoughts to coaches. Such cases should always be taken seriously, and the client concerned must be immediately introduced into an appropriate support structure. This may be a relevant counselling service, psychologist or therapist. Many business and governmental organizations provide counselling services contracted to offer this kind of support to their employees. As a coach or facilitator, it’s particularly important to be aware of locally available support structures so that a referral can be made should it be needed.
Finally, and on a positive note, there’s a lot of excellent help available that saves many lives daily. I encourage you to find out more about relevant, local points of contact in this regard and know how to contact them – just in case. You could bring a light that drives away the darkness in someone’s world and might even save a life!
Remember, Spring is here (at least in the southern hemisphere!) but wherever you are, let’s all look forward to brighter days ahead!
Take good care of yourself and those you love.
Suicide Crisis Line
0800 567 567
You can do something to help.
Looking out for a friend or loved one is an important part of preventing suicide.
In South Africa, there are 23 suicides a day recorded and 230 serious attempts.
You can call SADAG to talk on behalf of a loved one, colleague, or friend.
Trained counsellors are there to help and refer you to local counsellors, facilities and
Support Groups.
0800 21 22 23 (8am to 8pm)
0800 12 13 14 (8pm to 8am)
Or SMS 31393.
